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laffytaffy12495
  1. funny :) Found on http://www.butlerwebs.com/jokes/
    22nd Feb 2011 16:59
    13 years, 8 months & 24 days ago
  2. "Girls dont realize these things''
    23rd Jan 2011 15:59
    13 years, 9 months & 24 days ago
  3. lol :)
    17th Jan 2011 15:11
    13 years, 9 months & 30 days ago
  4. 10 signs you love someone
    17th Jan 2011 14:55
    13 years, 9 months & 30 days ago
  5. try not to cry
    31st Oct 2010 16:13
    14 years & 16 days ago
  6. written by a guy
    8th Jul 2010 11:27
    14 years, 4 months & 11 days ago
  7. female comebacks
    1st Apr 2010 18:39
    14 years, 7 months & 16 days ago
funny :) Found on http://www.butlerwebs.com/jokes/
13 years, 8 months & 24 days ago
22nd Feb 2011 16:59

You could describe that annoying person as:
A few beers short of a six-pack.
A few clowns short of a circus.
A few feathers short of a whole duck.
A few fries short of a Happy Meal.
A few peas short of a casserole.
A room temperature IQ.
All foam, no beer.
As smart as bait.
Body by Fisher-Price, Brains by Mattel.
Bright as Alaska in December.
Couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.
Donated his body to science before he was done using it.
Elevator doesn't go all the way to the top floor.
Fell out of the family tree.
Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold it all together.
Got into the gene pool while the lifeguard wasn't watching.
He fell out of the stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down.
He's so dense, light bends around him.
His antenna doesn't pick up all the channels.
His belt doesn't go through all the loops.
If brains were taxed, he'd get a rebate.
If he had another brain it would be lonely.
If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week.
If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get change.
If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean.
It's hard to believe that he beat out 1,000,000 other sperm.
Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
One Fruit Loop shy of a full bowl.
One-celled organisms out score him in IQ tests.
Proof that evolution CAN go in reverse.
Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; he only gargled.
Takes him 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes.
The wheel's spinning but the hamster's dead.

"Girls dont realize these things''
13 years, 9 months & 24 days ago
23rd Jan 2011 15:59

I'm sorry
that I bought you roses
to tell you that i like you

I'm sorry
That I was raised with respect
not to sleep with you when you were drunk

I'm sorry
That my body's not ripped enough
to "satisfy" your wants

I'm sorry
that I open your car door,
and pull out your chair like I was raised

I'm sorry
That I'm not cute enough
to be "your guy"

I'm sorry
That I am actually nice;
not a jerk

I'm sorry
I don't have a huge bank account
to buy you expensive things

I'm sorry
I like to spend quality nights at home
cuddling with you, instead of at a club

I'm sorry
I would rather make love to you then just screw you
like some random guy.

I'm sorry
That I am always the one you need to talk to,
but never good enough to date

I'm sorry
That I always held your hair back when you threw up,and didn't get mad at you for puking in my car,
but when we went out you went home with another guy

I'm sorry
That I am there to pick you up at 4am when your new man hit you and dropped you off in the middle of nowhere,
but not good enough to listen to me when I need a friend

I'm sorry
If I start not being there because it hurts being used as a door mat, only to be thrown to the side when the new jerk comes around

I'm sorry
If I don't answer my phone anymore when you call, to listen to you cry for hours, instead of getting a couple hours of sleep before work

I'm sorry
that you can't realize.. I've been the one all along.

I'm sorry
If you read this and know somebody like this
but don't care

But most of all

I'm sorry
For not being sorry anymore

I'm sorry
That you can't accept me for who I am

I'm sorry
I can never do anything right, and nothing that I do is good
enough to make it in your world.

I'm sorry
I caught your boyfriend with another girl and told you about it, I thought that was what friends were for...

I'm sorry
That I told you I loved you and actually meant it.

I'm sorry
That I talked to you for nine hours on Thanksgiving when your boyfriend was threatening you instead of spending time with my family.

I'm Sorry
That I cared


I'm sorry
that I listen to you at night talking about how you wish you could have done something different.

Ladies always complain and gripe to their friends that there is never any good guys out there, and they always end up with jerks who mistreat them. Well ladies next time you're complaining, maybe look up to see who you're complaining to, maybe that special someone is right there hanging on your every word as usual, screaming in his head "Why won't you give me a chance?"
Because the person you are usually searching for is right by you.

If you're a guy and you agree with this letter, repost as" I'm sorry."

If You're one of the FEW girls with enough GUTS to repost, and you would never make your guy feel this way, repost as Subject "Girls dont realize these things''

lol :)
13 years, 9 months & 30 days ago
17th Jan 2011 15:11

Pick the month you were born:
January-------I kicked
February------I loved
March--------I kissed
April----------I licked
May----------I jumped on
June----------I smelled
July-----------I did the Macarena With
August--------I had lunch with
September----I danced with
October-------I sang to
November-----I yelled at
December-----I ran over

Pick the day (number) you were born on:
1-------a birdbath
2-------a monster
3-------a phone
4-------a fork
5-------a snowman
6-------a gangster
7-------my mobile phone
8-------my dog
9-------my best friends' boyfriend
10-------my neighbor
11-------my science teacher
12-------a banana
13-------a fireman
14-------a stuffed animal
15-------a goat
16-------a pickle
17-------your mom
18-------a spoon
19------ - a smurf
20-------a baseball bat
21-------a ninja
22-------Chuck Norris
23-------a noodle
24-------a squirrel
25-------a football player
26-------my sister
27-------my brother
28-------an ipod
29-------a surfer
30-------a llama
31-------A homeless guy

Pick the color of shirt you are wearing:
White---------because I'm cool like that
Black---------because that's how I roll.
Pink-----------because I'm crazy.
Red-----------because the voices told me to.
Blue-----------because I'm sexy and I do what I want
Green---------because I think I need some serious help.
Purple---------because I'm AWESOME!
Gray----------because Big Bird said to and he's my leader.
Yellow--------because someone offered me 1,000,000 dollars
Orange--------because my family thinks I'm stupid anyway. Brown---------because I can..
Other----------because I'm a Ninja!
None----------because I can't control myself!


Mine: i ran over a fork because the voices told me to.

10 signs you love someone
13 years, 9 months & 30 days ago
17th Jan 2011 14:55

10 signs you love somebody <3


10 signs you [ l o v e ] someone...

10 signs you love someone

TEN:
You feel shy whenever they're around.



NINE:
You smile when you hear their voice.



EIGHT:
When you look at them, you can't see
the other people around you, you just
see him/her.


SIX:
They're all you think about.



FIVE:
You realize you're always smiling when
you're looking at them.



FOUR:
You would do anything for them, just
to see them.



THREE:
While reading this, there was one
person on your mind this whole time.



TWO:
You were so busy thinking about that
person, you didnt notice number seven
was missing


ONE:
You just scrolled up to check & are
now silently laughing at yourself.


NOW MAKE A WISH. YOU KNOW YOU WANT
TO......


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ALMOST THERE


*

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Post this as: 10 signs you love someone IN YOUR BLOG


*And something good will happen to you
tonight.


*If you don't... you'll certainly
regret it Wide Grin

try not to cry
14 years & 16 days ago
31st Oct 2010 16:13

Mommy...Johnny brought a gun to school.




He told his friends that it was cool,

And when he pulled the trigger back,

It shot with a great, huge crack.




Mommy, I was a good girl, I did what I was told,

I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold!

When I went to school that day,

I never said good-bye.




I'm sorry that I had to go, But Mommy, please don't cry.




When Johnny shot the gun, he hit me and another,

And all because Johnny, got the gun from his brother.




Mommy, please tell Daddy; That I love him very much,

And please tell Zack; my boyfriend; That it wasn't just a crush.




And tell my little sister; That she is the only one now,

And tell my dear sweet grandmother; I'll be waiting for her now

And tell my wonderful friends; That they always were the best

Mommy, I'm not the first, I'm no better than the rest

Mommy, tell my teachers; I won't show up for class,

And never to forget this, And please don't let this pass

Mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one, though. deserves this.




But mommy, it's not fair, I left without a kiss.




I think I even saw one doctor, trying not to cry.




Mommy, I'm slowly dying, with a bullet in my chest,

But Mommy please remember, I'm in heaven with the rest

When I heard that great, big crack, I ran as fast as I could

Please listen to me if you would,

I wanted to go to college, I wanted to try things that were new

I guess I'm not going with Daddy, On that trip to the new zoo I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid,

I wanted to be an actress, I really wanted to live.




But Mommy I must go now, The time is getting late,

Mommy, tell my Zack, I'm sorry I have to cancel the date.




I love you Mommy, I always have, I know you know its true

And Mommy all I need to say is, "Mommy, I love you"

In Memory of The Columbine & Virginia Tech Students Who Were Lost Please if you would, Don't smash this on the ground. If you pass this on, Maybe people will cry, Just keep this in your heart, For the people who didn't get to say "Good-bye".




Now you have 2 choices,

1) Pass this on, and show people you care, re-post as "Try Not To Cry"

2) Don't send it, and you have just proven how cold-hearted you really are...

This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her when she was still alive. The murder chanted, "Toma Sota balcu," as he buried her. Now that you have read this chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this on your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded.

  1. funny :) Found on http://www.butlerwebs.com/jokes/
    22nd Feb 2011 16:59
    13 years, 8 months & 24 days ago
  2. "Girls dont realize these things''
    23rd Jan 2011 15:59
    13 years, 9 months & 24 days ago
  3. lol :)
    17th Jan 2011 15:11
    13 years, 9 months & 30 days ago
  4. 10 signs you love someone
    17th Jan 2011 14:55
    13 years, 9 months & 30 days ago
  5. try not to cry
    31st Oct 2010 16:13
    14 years & 16 days ago
  6. written by a guy
    8th Jul 2010 11:27
    14 years, 4 months & 11 days ago
  7. female comebacks
    1st Apr 2010 18:39
    14 years, 7 months & 16 days ago