how to give a cat a pill

How to give a cat a pill

1) Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.

2) Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.

3) Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.

4) Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right fore-finger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.

5) Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden.

6) Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.

7) Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.

8) Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.

9) Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink glass of water to take taste away. Apply band-aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.

10) Retrieve cat from neighbour's shed. Get another pill. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.

11) Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus jab. Throw T-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

12) Ring fire brigade to retrieve cat from tree across the road. Apologise to neighbour who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil-wrap.

13) Tie cat's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of fillet steak. Hold head vertically and pour 2 pints of water down throat to wash pill down.

14) Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order new table.

15) Arrange for RSPCA to collect cat and ring local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters.
lol!

animal testings must stop!!!!!

I sat in my cage, with my brother and sisters. My mother fed us and cleaned us. We all enjoyed life, for we knew nothing that lay ahead.

One day I was tackling my brother who was much larger than me. A man with black gloves opened our cage and took my brother off of me. I sat up puzzled. The man shoved him in a small plastic cage, no bigger than him. My mother shoved my siblings aside and stretched her neck toward the man, trying to get her pup back. Then the man left the room. As he went out my brother cried and cried for help.

When I was a year old we were moved to a pen with other puppies my age. I never saw my brother again, though. 3 days later, my friends were taken away as my brother had been. I was now curious as to what was going on.

As I slept on a cold winter night, a large black truck drove up to our building. They came in with chain leashes. They opened several cages with young puppies and shoved them in a cage. My ears strained to hear the men. "Lets get the tan Labrador" one said. I backed into my cage as far as I could, because I knew I was a tan Lab. The man slammed open my cage and yanked my neck. He hooked on a chain around my neck and pulled me out. I bared my teeth at them trying to scare them without biting the 2 men. They lifted me up into a small cage in the truck. They got a few more dogs an shut the truck door. "This is it.." One dog whimpered. With the tone of his whimper, I knew we were headed somewhere dreadful.

We came into a white room with tons of shiny needle like things and sharp tools. One dog peed on the floor, he was so scared! They lifted us all onto a table and fasten us down. I felt a sharp pain on my hind leg, and my eyes started to cloud and them BOOM; I my eyes fell shut. I woke up with glossy fur and white teeth. People in white coats crowed around me, examining me. They were looking in my mouth, my ears, everywhere! On the table was 3 bottles, Shampoo, Tooth paste, and throat medicine of some sort. My stomach gurgled, at the site of tooth paste. The people saw that I was licking my stomach. They put a little bottle on the table that had a funky word. They opened it and shoved a little blue tablet down my throat. I gagged, and all of the sudden I felt a long shot feeling in my rear end. Then stood up. I couldn't take any of this! What were the doing to me? I bit of the cord on my leg and leapt off the table toward the man who had brought me here. I galloped up and clambered down on his arm. It started bleeding and the man shouted with pain and anger. "How do you like it?" I barked with his arm still in my mouth. A gun fired and the sound of my heart beat faded, and I let go of the man. I fell on the ground, soundless. It was over. All because people wanted to test products....on an animal.


If you think this is wrong, then post this on your blog!!